Are there times when you question whether you deserve something or not? A raise in salary? Better seats at a ball game or concert? A happy and loving relationship? Often people believe they may not deserve something, so they don’t ask for it or act on it. The reality is that if you perceive or believe you deserve it, you can achieve it.
I find myself often asking people if they think they deserve it? I do this to instill some form of confidence and belief that they do actually deserve it. I find when I force people to say it out loud, they often change their whole attitude and get what they deserve.
Recently, I hosted a large work dinner, and at the end of the evening, the restaurant automatically included an 18% gratuity. Our server, Ed, was truly exceptional—he worked tirelessly to take care of our group of 40 and delivered outstanding service throughout the night.
As the evening wrapped up, I felt Ed deserved more than the standard tip. When I went to thank him for his hard work, I asked if he thought he deserved a larger tip. Ed was a bit hesitant to answer at first, so I asked him again, letting him know I genuinely believed he had earned it. After a moment’s pause and a little encouragement, Ed’s face lit up and he enthusiastically agreed that he did, in fact, deserve it. And in the end, he got the extra tip he’d earned!
The next time you find yourself questioning whether you truly deserve something, take a moment to reflect on what makes you worthy. Don’t assume you deserve it simply because you want it, because it’s your turn, or because others say so. Instead, ask yourself: Did I give it my all? Did I put forth my best effort and deliver the best results I could?
When coaching professionals, I frequently remind them of everything they’ve earned through their hard work and achievements. I encourage reflection by asking thoughtful questions: What efforts have you made that demonstrate you are deserving? Would others agree with your assessment? Can you explain the specific behaviors you exhibited and the outcomes you achieved that support your sense of deservingness? These questions help professionals recognize and appreciate the value of their own contributions.
If the answer is yes, then take a deep breath, stand tall, and confidently declare to the world that you DESERVE IT!